The Development of Companionship and Intimacy

TLDR

The study examines how companionship and intimacy develop across childhood and adolescence. Participants were 7‑ to 13‑year‑old children in second, fifth, and eighth grades who rated the importance and extent of companionship and intimate disclosure in general and across eight relationship types. Companionship was consistently desired, with family importance declining and same‑sex peers becoming increasingly central, while opposite‑sex peers only emerged as companions in eighth grade; intimacy desire did not vary with age, though parents were key providers for younger children and same‑sex friends were mixed, with girls seeking intimate disclosure earlier than boys.

Abstract

This study is concerned with the development of companionship and intimacy. Subjects in the second, fifth, and eighth grades (mean ages, respectively, 7.5, 10.4, and 13.4) rated the importance and extent of companionship and intimate disclosure experienced in social life in general and in each of 8 types of relationships. Companionship was perceived as a desired social provision at all 3 grade levels. Family members were important providers of companionship for children in the second and fifth grades, but they became significantly less so in the eighth grade. Same-sex peers were important providers across all 3 grades, and they became increasingly important as children grew older. Opposite-sex peers did not become important as companions until the eighth grade. Counter to expectations, there were no age differences in the global desire for intimacy. Parents were important providers of intimate disclosure for the youngest children, but they were less important among the younger adolescents. There was mixed support for the hypothesis that same-sex friends become important providers of intimacy during preadolescence. Findings were different for boys and girls, suggesting that girls seek intimate disclosure in friendship at younger ages than boys do.