Role Expectations and Role Evaluations in Daughtering: Constructing the Good Daughter

Abstract

The relationship between mother and daughter is unlike other family dyads and important to both parties over a lifespan. One underexplored area of this relationship is how adult daughters construct and perform the daughtering role. The present study explores how daughters talk about the ways they enact daughtering and evaluate their role in a social world. The findings reveal how daughters position themselves within a family system and, more broadly, in society. This paper includes interview data with 33 adult daughters about their mothers. We illuminate more about how daughters, as role players, conceive of the expectations for their roles and evaluate their role performance in light of role expectations. Analysis revealed four role expectations tied to good daughtering: showing respect, providing protection, eliciting mothering, and making time for connection. Our analysis supports that daughters assess themselves based on their understanding of these role expectations. We present a matrix to illustrate these findings.