Understanding Infidelity: Pitfalls and Lessons for Couples Counselors

Abstract

Infidelity is a serious problem with serious consequences for couples and creates substantial obstacles for couples counselors. At the same time, it is the most often cited reason that couples come for counseling. The good news is that couples counselors can be effective in these areas, but not without understanding the emotional, mental, and physical complexity of infidelity. Unfortunately, many couples counselors do not feel adequately prepared to handle the subject of infidelity. There are several “pitfalls” into which counselors commonly fall. By understanding the relevant research on the effectiveness of couples counseling approaches and paying attention to a counselor's own personal reactions, a practitioner can help couples navigate the difficult, painful emotions that stem from infidelity.